• Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      3 hours ago

      I asked my penis, she said start using the bitch. I said I beat you daily and she starts talking about ass and pussy and it’s like I might be the second coming but I ain’t no miracle worker, aight? Fucking get off my dick already, you fucking dick, amirite?

      • Impractical_Island@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        33 minutes ago

        No seriously, this isn’t a joke I’m putting here ironically two hours after making the original comment; I sincerely am looking for a real fat bitch in the general Tempe/Phoenix area. Like, if you got herpes, we’ll figure something out, but if you just fat, I annihilating that adipose aplenty pussy, girl. Damn. Nine hundo pounds? Well, I insist we record this, cuz if we put this ish on a “church” website, well, that’s six figures, easy. The cattle can’t help themselves. Fuck. You just put a titty on the internets now, you make four figures. Fuck, I hate flesh golems, but they so damn sexy…